Monday, July 14, 2008

It's my Birth Day

Great picture huh?
Today's My Birth Day!!!
Yup......I've been around for 29yrs
Shut Up!!!!!!
Stop Laughing!!!!!!
OK OK ..that's why I quit calling it a Birth Day and more of an anniversary...........
It's my 10th Anniversary of my 29th Birth Day!!!!
I know there are those of you that will say Why lie about your age?......Your beautiful just as you are and I say BULLSHIT!!!.....Probably the bitches with Indian Blood and their whole body is hanging on their cheekbones!!Well I say no one in my family screwed over or screwed a Indian....much to my dismay!!!!! ..My dismay is that I don't have enough Indian blood not the screwed over thing!!!!!
Damn my slow lazy ass ancestors.........
Anyway those bitches that say.......I never lie about my age........I'm proud of how old and how good I look....are married to a plastic surgeon or they have money to afford plastic surgery.........Money makes you look younger then you are.You don't believe me?...............Well just send me your money and watch the years roll off my face!!!! You send me enough and me and Cheer Girl will be looking like the Judds!!!! "Grandpa tell me bout the good old days"
Those sick bastard that say "Grow old gracefully" don't know me. They don't know that I'm a bitch and I fight anything!!!!! I intend to fight this with everything I got........
People find out it's your Birthday..and ask your age....like that's OK......
What the fuck is wrong with these people?!!!!! Didn't their mama teach them any rules....there are 3 rules everyone should teach their children
#1.....Never NEVER ask a woman her age!
#2.....Never ask a man how much money he makes!
#3.....Never ask anyone how much they paid for something!
Three rules to live by.Simple
And those bitches that ask how old I am and then figure out the math of how many years I am older then they are........
"Oh your alot older then I am" They say
.............I say "And yet our kids are the same age..........wow you must've been having sex at a really young age..........You fuckin slut!!!!"..........hmmm can you tell that has happen to me before?!!
Well here's the unvarnished truth......for those of you who didn't do the math at the top ...........
I am 39!!!!!!

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

So, How old are ya really?

#1

Keeper Of All Things said...

Really I'm 39!!!!!
I asked Bud Man......he knows
LOL

QueenofPlanetHotflash said...

Happy Birthday!!!
39 is still young come bitchin to me when your lets say 50 and in menopause and when you laugh or sneeze you pee, then we'll talk.;)

Anonymous said...

AMEN Queen !!!!

#1

Keeper Of All Things said...

OK OK I'll come see ya when I'm 50!!!! Well party

Big Hair Envy said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!

I celebrated #42 last Tuesday. True story.

PinkPiddyPaws said...

You young little thang you.... ;) Just remember -- women are like wine and cheese.. we get better as we age. meow!!! Happy B-day!

Snooty Primadona said...

Will it make you feel any better that you're younger than me? You little shit, lol.

I'm with the Queen here. Just wait until you're my age and going through menopause. I can't tell you how fun it is to sneeze or cough and let out an unplanned toot. I always snap my head and look at the person nearest to me, like it was them, not me. Hey - I've gotten good at that.

Anyway, Happy Birthday, you little shit! Enjoy your 40's, cause the 50's will be upon you in no time. Don't you just love people who say things like that? Hehehehe... Really though, have a great day.

Keeper Of All Things said...

Thank you for giving me something to look forward to Mrs.Snooty

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday !
You look fabulous!!!!

You are just a mere baby at 39....

Have a great day!!!!


peace
#2

I Am Woody said...

Happy Birthday!! I've got a couple of years on you too!!

Pleasing Procrasinator said...

I now see birthdays as just another excuse to drink too much.
Happy Birthday!! Love you!

Tami said...

Happy Birthday! Sorry I didn't call you :(

Unknown said...

You are a hoot!

You are as young or old as you feel, and your beauty is apparent.

Happy Birthday!