Saturday, April 18, 2009

I'm gonna rip his balls out through his mouth!!!!

I'm gonna fuckin shoot Bud Man !!!
I swear to GWAD!!!!!!
If that man doesn't shut his fucking mouth while I'm driving ............................
He won't stop telling me how to drive............

"I wouldn't go to fast through here ......there's always speed traps"
But I'm not you........so shut up!!! I turn the music up

"That's a sheriff helicopter ,looking for people weaving in and out of traffic. Joe just got a ticket last week because of them."
Now your just making shit up.......like I'm gonna believe that stupid effin line!!! Music gets another couple of notches.Window comes down.

"Your gonna want to slow down and get in the right lane. your exit is up ahead. "
I've got a whole nother mile......and five more jackasses ahead of me...........and one beside me soooooooo FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.................JUST SHUT THE HELL UP AND LET ME DRIVE THE FUCKING CAR!!!
Music is almost full blast now..........windows all the way down and I light a cigarette.......oh yea.....cause if he thinks I cant drive with windows up , music down and nothing else to occupy my hands ................hes got another think coming!!!!!

It's amazing how I'm able to get 4........count them FOUR!!!! children where they need to be and SAFELY!!! without him there to tell me how to drive.

I'm not gonna lie................It flashed through my mind....................if I just bagged him in the nuts he might just shut the fuck up for 20 minutes.

Then I could have sweet driving bliss!!!!

11 comments:

Living on the Spit said...

Awwww...I feel your pain.

You can vent with me anytime!

Tami said...

That sounds painful!!

Its good to know you are still alive - hehe!

D started a blog, link is on mine :)

I miss you, we have to get together soon!!

Grandma J said...

Looks like you made it without an accident or a ticket.

Snooty Primadona said...

It has to be a *man thing* because Mr. Snooty does the same irritating shit! Makes me wonder how I ever made it through traffic without his back seat driving and that imaginary brake he has over there on his side, lol. He never does the driving when we're together, so watching him flinch and slam on that passenger side brake cracks me up. My favorite line from him is "Jesus Christ! You just nearly had a wreck!" Well, nearly doesn't fucking cut it does it? Aaaaargh!

Obviously, I feel your pain!

ModernMom said...

HA ha ha
I think all men are wired the same way. Mine LOVES to tell me how to park...yeah, because I haven't being doing that for 20 or so years.

Cathie said...

They act like this b/c they are not in control of the steering wheel.

Shawn said...

Mine must be warped...he leans back and goes to sleep when I drive.

What am I thinking...of course he's warped.

Renaissance Woman said...

Good vent! Pull over the next time and make him get out and walk. I'll bet he would love your driving then!

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

I hope he was a least in the back seat!

Philly said...

I just don't drive when my hub is in the car, end of story.

#1

My Metabolic Rate is Stuck said...

WOW! BudMan and ROCK took lessons together! I NEVER NEVER correct his driving...okay hardly ever!
And especially when he raises his voice a little bacause he thinks I might hit something....I WILL HIT something when he SCARES me like that!!!